Shame on every last one of you.

Where is the adulation to which I've become accustomed? Was yesterday not the greatest day in the calendar year? Maybe you were hunkering down for a hurricane that wound up falling flat. Maybe you were in the middle of some sort of Labor Day Weekend escape. Maybe you think my facebook page is the place where I conduct my business now, and is therefore the suitable place to share your wishes of happiness for me.

I had to leave Louisiana as the National Guard was under specific orders not to let a National Treasure be anywhere near danger. I suppose its possible that what happened is that the months and months that go into planning a party for me were foiled by the catastrophic threat, and the balloons, and flowers, and fireworks, and ice sculptures, and carnival rides, and unique spectacles for which experts in their respective fields have scoured the globe all for my pleasure, were just too much to relocate on short notice. Yes, that must be it.

Well as magnanimous as I am, I will grant forgiveness for sizeable donations.